Bebe’s Bliss
Dedication
This work is owed to my mother Genevieve, who taught me compassion, to my teacher Larkin, who taught me insight, and to my daughter Tegan, who teaches me love.
Special thanks to my friends Doug and Ango, who encouraged me to carry on when my confidence ebbed. It took the aid of all five for me to complete this spiritual journey.
Love, Chaking
AUTHOR’S NOTES
We are all ephemeral beings. Hopefully, we are continually transitioning toward an ever more mindful, insightful and wise awareness.
It has been conjectured that Vincent Van Gogh was synesthetic. While this will never be verifiable, it inspired me to correlate concepts with shapes, emotions with colors, and an historical figure with a fictional character.
At the Gettysburg Cemetery dedication ceremony Edward Everett spoke for two hours, Abraham Lincoln spoke for two minutes. After the ceremony Mr. Everett complimented Mr. Lincoln on the superiority of his speech. I hope to emulate Lincoln.
Kansas
This is the story of how Bebe taught herself how to live at peace with her emotions.
This is her story, so all I’ll tell you about myself is that I am an artist, therefore I will relate her story along with images that illustrate the words. Bebe is too modest to relate her story herself but, having read some of my writing she felt I could help her share her story. Getting to know Bebe’s story has been a great pleasure, sharing it with you will be another.
The title of this section is Kansas (after the place Dorothy lived before and after going to Oz) to emphasize what this story is and is not about. This story is not about where Bebe is from, what color her skin or hair is, what religion she practices, or even what language she speaks.
The reader may wish to know these details to identify with or insulate themselves from identifying with the heroine. However, all of these things, and more, the reader may supply for themselves if they wish, or not.
What this story is about, is the innermost private life of a person in their search for happiness. A human being like each of us, who must deal with thoughts and emotions that arise, have their impact and fade away moment to moment, every second of every day. It is a story of how one person found within themselves, through careful and sensitive self exploration, solutions to problems that bedevil us all. A story relatable to any person, time or place.
Even the causes of her thoughts and emotions are not a part of this story. There are multitudes of provocations for every sentiment, some with, and some without acceptable resolutions. What is important is not the cause, nor the solution, but the logical reaction. How does one deal internally with a strong emotion? This story is about how Bebe finds strengths that are available to each of us, if we take the time and make the effort to search within ourselves. Using our innate perception, intelligence, and sensitivity we are all capable of rising above gut reactions and, with practice, training ourselves to deal with the tribulations of our existence in a sensitive and compassionate manner.
In this story Bebe encounters the three greatest trials of human composure, swirling red hate, obtuse blue fear and radiant yellow love. Psychologists refer to them as the primary motivating factors. Being a person of sensitivity, she feels these emotions deeply, which forces her to think even more deeply about the proper reactions to them.
Obviously, Bebe is strong willed. Surrender to an overwhelming emotion is never considered. Like the story of our human family through all our history, this is a story of victory over adversity. Though at times it seemed solutions were eternally elusive, we have, with determination, sacrifice and hope, eventually progressed. Immanuel Kant said, ”Live your life as if your every act were to become universal law.” Never be satisfied to hide behind current limitations. Exert strenuous effort to expand and enhance abilities, and refine perceptions. Be willing to devote the time and effort, and gain what Bebe gains in this story-- freedom from disquieting thoughts and their oppressive emotions, resulting in the pleasure of a life lived in serenity.
Here is an abstract impression of the spirit of a Painted Bunting flitting beyond the border of Kansas, in the hope that it will help free your spirit so that it may soar beyond the boundaries of a mundane perspective.
Hate
Bebe had always been content and may never have started her search for serenity if it had not been for the actions of a person in a position of power, who abused that power and selfishly and callously caused her grievous harm. Hate overwhelmed her! She experienced it with all five of her senses! It tasted like caustic mold. It smelled of an ancient crypt. It had the sound of a hurricane bearing down on an orphanage.
It burned with the intensity of a blast furnace. The entire world wore blazing crimson trimmed in smears of the blackest soot. It seemed time raced with her pulse, hammering ever faster. This physical and emotional rupture jarred her sense of normalcy so completely and intimately, she even felt alienated from herself. Emotionally, she was no longer the sweet and kind Bebe, but the bitter and cruel Bratina Bratinstein. It seemed to her as if her interior world was a vortex of blood red rage swirling up from the abysmal black depths of her being. She was seething with anger and resentment over the injustice of her situation. Through a darkly tormented night she struggled internally, grasping for coherence.
Bratina would rave and Bebe would comfort, and the red and black vortex would spin. Bebe would grieve and Bratina would scold, and the vortex would spin; a torturous gyre of searing scarlet recriminations and shadowy justifications, choking her slumber and abusing her reasoning. She was convinced she was doomed to drown in a swirling viscous quagmire of iniquity and rejection.
Finally, dawn’s cleansing radiance illuminated the futility of her exhausting storm of warring emotions. The fantastic beauty of the regenerative sunrise gave birth to an inspiration. It reminded her of the story of the Phoenix rising from its ashes. She would compose herself, gather her senses, and launch her total being into an all out effort for release and redemption. After all, the object of her hatred felt none of it, and she was suffering greatly from it. Desperate to purify herself of her rebellious emotions, she resolved to banish the wicked Bratina Bratinstein and determine a proper course. A course guided by reason and compassion, ending in serenity. With the calm that accompanies profound resolve, she sat and reflected on the fiery discord she had had with Bratina through the night. After much thought, she composed an assertion of her intent to use as her guide.
Guide
This is what I should do to gain serenity.
I should be able and upright,
straightforward and gentle in speech,
humble and not conceited,
contented and easily satisfied,
eager in my duties and frugal in my desires.
I should not be proud and demanding in nature. As I wish to be tranquil, may all beings be tranquil.
I desire that all deception and hostility should cease, going so far as to wish that everyone
would treat every thinking being as a dear relation.
Radiating unbounded kindness and wishing all
be freed from the self imposed oppression of hatred. I should maintain this mindset at all times.
To fully integrate her new path into her life and with a deep understanding of what “every thinking being” meant, she resolved to never again eat anything that had ever had a thought. After all, how could she even consider consuming a dear relation? The very idea was revolting.
Satisfied she could do no more without some rejuvenation, she collapsed into a soothing slumber.
DESIRE FOR CONTROL
As Bebe woke after just a few hours, she remembered every moment of her rest. She recalled how during her sleep she had come to comprehend important things about the true nature of her emotional landscape. The key revelations were that, not just the negative aspects of life like hate and fear, but even the most positive, like love, were unsatisfactory in some way.
Indeed, that dissatisfaction is created within. The selfish desire to have the world be in some way, other than it is, creates that dissatisfaction. There is a way to stop feeding these selfish desires. Further, every emotion she had during that tumultuous night, in fact, every emotion she had ever had, was the direct result of its causative thought! As Peace Pilgrim said, “If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never have a negative thought.” If she was to ever gain control of disruptive emotions, including her selfish desires, she would first need to gain control of her thoughts!
These revelations stimulated her intellectually and emotionally, her mind raced, her heart sped, her skin tingled and her breathing became rapid. Her world whirled and whirred around her. It was too much. She needed to think clearly, to do that she needed to calm herself. She reasoned that if these extraordinary revelations had come to her while in a dream state, it might be worth the effort to attempt to replicate the clarity of that dream state while awake. To do this she went to her favorite little nook in her bedroom. She filled it with the lovely scent of roses from the garden. She wore her purple satin robe and slippers to invoke the power of a royal summons. She sat on the big white cushion her grandmother had given her for her last birthday. White, to underscore the purity of her intent. It was important that she was comfortable and relaxed but equally important that she was fully alert. Reasoning that if strong emotions could agitate the body, then calming the body could soothe her emotions. She took all the time needed to relax her muscles from head to toe. She paid close attention to her breath, watching as the tensions eased a little more with each exhalation. She gazed without seeing until she was sure she was calm enough to think clearly and purposefully. Only when she felt completely composed did she begin to center her attention on her subject.
She thought with the focus of a laser beam. She thought as deeply as the deepest sea. She thought for a prolonged time. An image came to her mind full of meaning. Responding to the royal summons, an expanse of regal purple emerged, while projectiles of immaculate white hurtled in a spiraling fashion toward a central intention. Each little alabaster essay represented an aspect of the manual she would employ. The path ahead would entail a great deal of concerted effort and diligent dedication, but she was determined that she would never again suffer the horrid trauma of rampantly ruinous emotions. To achieve her goal of serenity, she resolved that she would embark on a path of eight interdependent elements.
As she had begun today, she would cultivate correct understanding.
To avoid being led astray by ill-considered thoughts, she would need to mind her thoughts.
The final goal of serenity could be the only focus of her intent.
As bad habits could only delay success, proper conduct is important.
She should speak thoughtfully.
Her daily activities must align with the overall practice.
It is best to concentrate, trifling effort gives trifling results
Continuous effort in all elements is most beneficial.
A path meant to be a pattern, to be contemplated, and fully integrated into each aspect of her life. Step by step, as any opportunity arose, her path and her spirit would blend until one could not be distinguished from the other.
MINDFULNESS
Immediately upon rising from her cushion Bebe took a stroll through her neighborhood. It had seemed a foreboding alien landscape when she was allowing her petulant emotions to rule. But, all that had changed, now it was a floral eden. She felt elevated. 2. Minding her thoughts as they came up she became more aware of several things.
Noticing how quickly one thought was exchanged for another helped her realize it was foolish to be carried away by the emotion it created when the very next thought would send her careening around another emotional roller coaster. Thoughts would come and thoughts would go, like clouds crossing the sky, and she would let them. This released a tension that had been building inside since the outbreak of her fit of anger. The tightness in her chest was gone. She made a deep healthy sigh of heartfelt relief.
Compassion welled up inside her. Compassion, not selfish desire, would be her driving force
Compassion for the untold millions who never get beyond the everyday stream of consciousness. Struggling, as she had done, to make sense of every little bump of emotion. Fighting within themselves for moderation between introverted selfish desires and extroverted altruistic impulses. Fighting with each other for moderation between regressive martial designs and progressive humanitarian instinct. This brought her back to the guide she had composed for herself.
The lines- “I desire that all deception and hostility should cease, going so far as to wish that everyone
would treat every thinking being as a dear relation.”
held great new meaning for her now. All at once, a huge burden was lifted from her shoulders. She literally felt ten pounds lighter, but much more than importantly, her entire outlook on the world changed. She embraced every member of the human family as a member of her immediate family, an actual dear relation. Going from a divisive tribal perspective to holistic familial perspective was like emerging from a long dark ominous tunnel into the bright cheery sunlight of an alpine meadow in full spring blossom. She had remade her world.
Now this may seem poetic and Pollyannish to those who have not made this transition. They may believe this condition cannot last and that if it does, the person it happens to is doomed to disappointment and abuse. This is not so. It is only a change of perspective, not an abandonment of rational thought. One still continues to encounter the problems of the world, but rather than seeing them as threats to be defeated one sees them as puzzles to be solved!
This was the beginning of a bright new light in her. She found the colors of her emotional landscape had been transmuted. As bronze is an alloy of copper and tin, so compassion is a melding of heart and mind. So it was that red rage was now compassionate bronze, threatening black was now supportive ebony, the purple royal summons was a pleasant lavender invitation and pure white intention had become a supernova of brilliant white understanding. It had become her guiding light. Leading her up a path from which she would never stray. A mindful path of compassion, understanding, and generosity.
This guiding light also made some other things clear to her. Not that she had ever wanted to, but now there was a new imperative for her to avoid things that would be detrimental to her new found sense of well-being. So, she made five resolutions that she never, ever broke. Not to steal. Not to lie. Not to engage in harmful occupations. Not to take any substance that would degrade her ability to be mindful. Never to be involved in any relationship that was not completely sincere. She envisioned her guiding light of compassion adorning a deep pool of mindfulness with the grace of a swan on an alpine lake.
Having experienced such positive results in such a short time, she headed home confident she had refined a method to solve any puzzle.
FEAR
Bebe awoke to another glorious day. She could not help but smile with contentment. While she arranged fresh roses she reflected on all she had thought and felt. She wondered about what the future might hold. Could it be a continuous gradual ascension, slowly uplifting her spirit to a point where there was no possibility of further progress? Surely, there would at least be minor setbacks. Nothing too drastic she hoped.
She wondered how well she could handle something major. She really did not want to have to deal with another major crisis anytime soon!
Then the phone rang. It was terrifying news. Immediately the physical effects were manifested, Bebe felt as if there was a block of ice between her shoulder blades sliding frost down her spine and slinking chills through her limbs. A frigid sensation seeped through her chest, threatening to stop her heart. A dark blue veil obscured her vision. The world went deaf. All sensations ceased. Time itself froze in place.
Bebe’s internal world had become nothing more and nothing less than an immobilizing cube of fear-laden ice and its debilitating effects. An image of her frigid affliction dominated and entranced her imagination. Arctic white at its core, it expanded in ever larger cubes and darker shades of blue. It threatened to become her permanent condition like the permafrost of the far north. In which direction could she turn to find the warming sun of hope?
Bratina whispered sarcastically in Bebe’s ear “This fear is just what you deserve. You are so good. So sweet. So perfect. Nothing bad could ever happen to the wonderful beautiful beloved! HA! Now, the world will behold what Princess Precious does when cruel fate says NO! Oh, I am going to love watching you suffer through the torments of dread, distress and despair! What a delight it will be to watch you wring your hands with blue-gray hopelessness!”
Bratinas’ words did not smother Bebe’s spirit, but instead provided the breath of life. Bebe used them for the inspiration to inflate her will and raise her resistance. Slowly, ever so slowly, Bebe’s world transitioned back. From blue-gray hopelessness, to a blue veil obscuring the morning sun, to the warmth the sun created on her face. Sensations returned, and she returned to the world. All hope was not yet lost. It was obvious it would take some practice to learn to treat her thoughts like clouds crossing the sky. She remembered her path of eight interdependent elements. 3. The final goal of serenity could be the only focus of her intent.
Allowing Bratina to put a ring through her nose and lead her through an endless nightmarish maze would be the antithesis of that goal. Again, she expelled Bratina Bratinstein from her thoughts and recalled these lines from her guide.
This is what I should do to gain serenity.
I should be able and upright,
straightforward and gentle in speech,
humble and not conceited,
contented and easily satisfied,
in my duties and frugal in my desires.
I should not be proud and demanding in nature
She decided to view this crisis not as a setback but as an opportunity to utilize it as a focal point for her method. Hoping for a smooth and gentle path had been wishful thinking, and now it dawned on her that it was the opposite of what she should have wished for. If she truly wanted to make real progress, she should wish for great trials with substantial consequences to force herself to have a laser beam focus on her goal! There could be no doubt that this would be an intricate puzzle, but the greater the challenge, the greater the satisfaction in success. As bad as the news was, it was not the end of the world, with effort, it could be managed. The path forward remained open. Her life would change, but all things are impermanent and subject to change.
She reminded herself that change is good, because without change there is no life.
DESIRE FOR KNOWLEDGE
Bebe returned to her path of eight interdependent elements. 4. As bad habits could only delay success, proper conduct is important. In this case, proper conduct meant a return to the white cushion. It now represented much more than just the purity of her intent. It was the place where she would best connect with her guiding light of compassion.
She knew her grandmother would be pleased it was put to such good use. The fresh roses filled the room with a calming, sweet aroma. She wore a forest green silk dressing gown and stockings to honor the admiration she held for the fearless. Those who confront danger, accepting the challenge for the sake of their loved ones.
She repeated the steps she had taken before to soothe her emotions and calm her mind. She relaxed her muscles head to toe and paid close attention to her breath. Once again she gazed without seeing. She thought with focus. She thought deeply. She thought for a long time. An image came to her mind. It was the block of ice she had felt between her shoulder blades. It was floating in space in front of her guiding light of compassion. With a forest green laser beam of focus, the light bore a hole through its center, making it a hollow shell of its former self. Now it glowed in lovely shades of green. Now it wasn’t so fear laden. She turned it in her mind, examining it from every angle, delving into its very core. It came to her that fear is not the root problem. The root problem is ignorance. We fear what we do not understand and therefore cannot control. That which we fully understand and therefore can control, we do not fear!
So, then she thought about ignorance. But how does one approach it? Again, she denied the divisive tribal perspective and embraced the holistic familial perspective. She did not treat fear as a threat to be defeated but as a puzzle to be solved. She determined that if you approach ignorance from a position of hatred, the negative emotion fear is created, the very puzzle you set out to solve. However if you approach ignorance with compassionate love, wonder is created, a positive and fertile catalyst for innovation!
If she could not treat fear like a cloud crossing the sky when confronted by it, the proper conduct would be to treat it as an indication of ignorance. Embrace the fear and revel in the opportunity for growth! Immerse herself in the thoughts that create the fear. Find where the lack of knowledge is acute. Determine how the proper information can be obtained. Exhaust every effort to obtain that information. Develop her understanding until the puzzle is completely solved, and be free of that negative emotion.
By doing this Bebe came to a profound realization. The way things actually are - interdependent. She knew what had caused her turmoil was her selfish desire for things to be a certain way instead of how they naturally are. Cause and effect. She realized that she was only a very small part of a very large whole. Not just the universe, which is all that there is now, but Totality which is, all that there ever was, is, and will be. That she needed to frame her thoughts around what is best for Totality rather than what she desired for herself at that moment in time. Her compassion had allowed her to see that she had been denying the reality of the oneness of the human family and all creation. Erik Erikson was so right when he said,”Life doesn’t make any sense without interdependence. We need each other and the sooner we learn that the better for us all”. She needed to get her ego out of the way and let be, what is.
Just as plants use the yellow rays of the sun to turn lowly brown mud into green chlorophyll, the source of nutrition for all life on land, Bebe had used the bronzed light of compassion to turn cold blue fear into aquamarine wonder, a source of spiritual nutrition for the entire human family.
In this way Bebe followed the example of the fearless heroes she admired. She had confronted danger by facing fear itself. She accepted the challenge for the sake of her own serenity and in the hope that she could provide a path for others to follow.
INSIGHT
Bebe took another stroll through her neighborhood. It seemed more welcoming, she was more tranquil, it seemed the world was more tranquil. She had come a long way for not having left her neighborhood. Yet, she felt she still needed to 5.
Speak thoughtfully to herself about resolving the puzzle of ignorance with compassion. Her insight progressed something like this.
Yes, speaking thoughtfully includes speaking to yourself. Most people who are still chained to the divisive tribal perspective live the majority of their lives engaged in an internal dialogue which vacillates between agonizing over past mistakes and fretting about future hazards. This wasted emotional energy only contributes to the unsatisfactory nature of life. As Mark Twain observed about his own experience, “There has been much tragedy in my life, at least half of it actually happened.” There was probably much less. The past is only a memory, the future only a fantasy. This moment right now is the only moment any of us ever have. Speak, or really, don’t speak to yourself about what is happening right now. Experience it, react to it, interact with it!
Let what is, be. If you can do that, fear will rarely, if ever have the opportunity to arise. Cause and effect. Garbage in, garbage out. This applies to the mind as well. If you spend hours playing violent video games and viewing frightening images, your mind will create foreboding thoughts. As Meister Eckhart said, “What we plant in the soil of contemplation, we reap in the harvest of action.” It is very important to be compassionate with yourself and eliminate negative input, from the internal world as well as the external one.
Of course, speaking thoughtfully also involves speaking with others. Some people like to say that, sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. Well, that may be the easier path, but it is never the most compassionate path. One must take the time and make the effort to always frame your thoughts and gently speak your piece with compassion, understanding and generosity. This is the helpful and healthful path. It is common knowledge that negative thoughts have a negative impact on health as well. Ulcers, tension headaches, nervous ticks, stress, and many other ailments are caused by an inability to manage one's thoughts. That is, habitually engaging a rancorous, argumentative train of thought. This will also undoubtedly itself in conversation, thus unkindly affecting the wellbeing of others. Cause and effect.
So, if you are not wasting hours filling your mind with negativity and instead learning to Wonder, what are you doing? Well, you are engaged in developing compassionate activities. The list is long and fulfilling. It includes friends, family, school, charity, sports, the arts, nature, self improvement and more! Develop your sense of Wonder by seeing the human family and all creation in its oneness - interconnected and interdependent.
And yet, mostly, this is just common sense. Bebe had gained a certain amount of insight by accepting the challenge, and confronting fear. Perhaps the greatest part of insight is simply having the courage and resolve to see, and react with sensitivity to things as they actually are.
Bebe realized it had become evening. She gazed up at the beautiful starry sky. She thought about how little we know about this source of Wonder floating above us, night and day.
Remembering the images of fear and desire for knowledge that had previously come to her mind, she wondered what insight might look like. Suddenly, there it was, superimposed on the night sky in shades of aquamarine. A crystalline window of reason, framing her guiding light of compassion. Insight was fascinating her mind with sparkling bits of Wonder and comforting her heart with the silvery glow of understanding.
Bebe returned home for a well deserved night of rest.
Love
Bebe woke the next morning feeling more alive than she had ever felt. After all the drama she had experienced, this peace she felt was so welcome, she hoped it would never end. The wonderful intensity of her senses made her feel she was in love with the world.
Everything she saw was perfect in her eyes, perfect room, perfect house, perfect garden, perfect neighborhood, perfect world. The House Wren sang his song more joyfully than he had ever sung. Her morning juice made her sigh with its sweetness. The scent of the Mongolian Lilac mixed with that of the Peace Rose in such perfect balance she would cherish the memory of that heavenly confection forever. Her skin tingled with joy. Her awareness expanded, with such acuity that in each second she reveled in several miracles. A dust mote floating perfectly still. A tiny rainbow in the corner of the window pane. A butterfly sipping a flower’s nectar. Wind chimes played a melody, while a downspout dripped time. A breath of a breeze, the perfect temperature. Her spirit floated blissfully from moment to moment. The breeze whispered through the pines... love.
Bebe thought of all the people and things she loved. Her family, her friends, her classmates, her teachers, her pets, her friends' pets, her house and garden and on and on. It was a moment of perfect bliss. Bratina whispered in her ear “What about the people and things you don’t LOVE?” Bratina had snuck back from exile long enough to burst Bebe’s little bubble of a daydream. What an ominous little cloud crossing the sky that was! Although Bebe evicted her immediately, Bratina’s intrusive reappearance forced Bebe to realize, the very thoughts and emotions that had brought such great pleasures would bring equally great challenges. Bratina proposed that it isn’t enough to love certain things and ignore or avoid others. And the things she did love, she may or may not love them completely, without reservation. There is no oneness in picking and choosing.
Bebe realized she had cruised at full speed into an iceberg. But, she was not going to go down like the Titanic. As she had done with the negative emotions of hate and fear, she would now deal with the positive emotion of love. She thought of Anton Chekhov “Being in love shows a person who he should be.” She had her path of eight interdependent elements. 6. Her daily activities must align with her overall practice. Moment to moment she must use compassion, understanding and generosity while experiencing love and the absence of love in all its different shades of intensity and hues of significance. She could not love all beings while working at an arms factory. She could not be gentle in speech while cursing the darkness.
The goal being Serenity, she could not go serenely from loving one thing to loving another while ignoring or avoiding yet another. She could not jump from a huge world of blissful saffron to a contented amber moonlet with no thought of the dark void between. And what about these dreamy orbs? Were they flawlessly perfect, or were there bothersome little imperfections one must tolerate? Why was she picking and choosing what to love and what not to love? What is it that loves? What suffers from the absence of love?
Bebe considered what was important to concentrate on at this point. A couple of her previous thoughts came to mind. A line from her guide - “I should be eager in my duties”, and that she should wish for great trials with substantial consequences to force herself to have a laser beam focus on her goal! She was eager, because an expanding love for the human family had intensified the ardor in her mind and the flame in her heart. It made her enthusiastic for the great trial that could bring the abundant rewards of fully comprehending love. The story of the human family is the story of love! What greater trial could there be than the trial of Love?
Bebe felt what an artist must feel when they believe they about to create a piece that will educate, inspire and commune with the human family. A piece imbued with exquisite and eternal beauty
DESIRE FOR UNION
Bebe reviewed what she had practiced on her path of eight elements.
As she had begun, she would cultivate
correct understanding.To avoid being led astray by ill
considered thoughts, she would need to
mind her thoughts.The final goal of serenity could be the only
focus of her intent.As bad habits could only delay success, proper conduct is important.
She should speak thoughtfully.
Her daily activities must align with the overall practice.
It is best to concentrate, trifling effort gives trifling results
She felt calm and confident. Before returning to her cushion, she added a large spray of lilacs across from the roses, the effect was simultaneously invigorating and soothing. She wore a saffron robe and matching footies to symbolize the love she felt growing inside. The white cushion welcomed her with the open arms of compassion. She was sure that compassion should be her starting point, and would be an integral part of her ending point.
She relaxed her muscles head to toe and paid close attention to her breath. She gazed without seeing. She thought with focus. She thought deeply. She thought for a long time. She denied the divisive tribal perspective and embraced the holistic familial perspective. She focused her guiding light of compassion on the desire to give and receive love. It was not a menacing threat to be defeated, but a wonder filled puzzle to be solved.
Her desire for union could be viewed as interlocking orange circles. For her, the ragged orange circles represented many levels of desire. It was an interference pattern. It represented the way she had been interacting with Totality. Totality being all that was, is, and will be. On every level of desire, she was one circle and Totality was the other. Self and other. It was a false reality. An egotistical reality of selfish picking and choosing. On the physical, mental and emotional levels the circles could never be concentric, she would always be significantly alone.
Only on the level that fully comprehends and appreciates the interconnectedness of all things, the level of oneness, are they always concentric. So, she was always alone and never alone. The degree of her aloneness depended on her awareness of the oneness of Totality at any moment in time. If she could dispel the illusion of separation between self and other, and maintain a selfless awareness of oneness, she would maintain an awareness of never being alone. Thus, her understanding became, that which loves, and suffers from the absence of love is the intuitive awareness of eternal oneness. This was what had enabled her to write these lines before she fully comprehended them.
Radiating unbounded kindness and wishing
all be freed from the self imposed oppression of hatred.
I should maintain this mindset at all times.
Her guiding light of compassion had illuminated the dark void of avoidance between the glowing orbs of affection. It was dispersing the shadowy regions she had needed to puzzle over. Now her understanding of the oneness of the human family had become her comprehension of the oneness of Totality. All that is, is the result of what was, and all that will be, will be the result of what is. This created an imperative to selflessly increase comprehension within the human family of the oneness of Totality. Thereby enhancing the human experience by providing peace and meaning. So, for Bebe, compassion, understanding and generosity had become compassion, comprehension and selflessness.
WISDOM
As Bebe strolled once again through her neighborhood, she was delighted by how the changes she had adopted within her mind had changed the way she perceived her world. She had recreated the world in which she lived. Just days ago it had been foreboding and alien, then welcoming and tranquil.
Now, she felt intimately connected to each and every thing that entered her awareness. She was it and it was her. In her mind, this concept and feeling of intimacy radiated outward, at first, just to the horizon, then rapidly to envelop the world, then instantaneously the universe. It was a wonderful moment, she was experiencing a profound love. But, she needed to fully comprehend its nature so as not to be consumed by it and become lost in it.
There are people who for various reasons, upon attaining an understanding, fail to continue on to a full comprehension. Bebe returned to her path, 8. Continuous effort in all elements is most beneficial. She understood that what she was experiencing was the internal feedback of her recent realization. That which loves, and suffers from the absence of love is the intuitive awareness of eternal oneness. She likened it to the discovery of parental love for a child, at first awesome and magnificent, then diminishing in intensity over time, but never forgotten nor rejected. This was combined with an abundance of fraternal love engendering a great feeling of endearing friendship with totality. Also, there was the aspect of a religious fervor, which can be like an unbridled love for an absent parent. But, this was more like an understanding of religion without being a religious understanding or an act of faith. All these things and more energized her mind and charged her emotions. Further, it seemed to her that this was innate to humanity as a whole, like the nod for yes, the shake for no, the hush for quiet and the affinity with fairness.
This brought her back to thoughts of the human family and how lamentable it was that the physical distances between our disparate branches had created so much alienation. Now, with modern technology we have the tools we need to overcome these handicaps and redress the misconceptions of millenia. Now, we can reach the realization that the tribe is the entire human family, and with time and fuller comprehension, that can be expanded exponentially to include all beings. The entire human family can begin to radiate unbounded kindness over the entire world and beyond.
Radiating unbounded kindness was the best way of describing her internal world at this point. Her guiding light of compassion remained at the core of her being, radiating unbounded loving kindness and the selfless desire for the entire human family to be freed from all forms of ignorance. Reflecting on her ego, it seemed a churlish, infantile notion, embarrassing to admit to. Her sense of oneness was growing stronger and deepening in comprehension moment by moment. A comprehension of the reality of the oneness of Totality that was both intimately personal and universally encompassing. The thought of aloneness now seemed alien. She couldn’t feel alone while comprehending the core of her being to be the selfsame core of every other being. The darkness of the void of ignorance was giving way in ever expanding concentric circles, highlighted by golden glints of the wisdom of universal love and wave after wave of compassion, comprehension and selflessness.
Bebe sat a while by a brook in her neighborhood park to attempt to appreciate it all. She felt more alive than she had ever felt. Each of her senses was on full alert, energizing her awareness with the abundance of existence. Her mind was full of powerful concepts, each crowding to come to the fore. Yet, her emotion was one of calm and contentment. She was centered because she comprehended that the center of the universe could be experiencing our interdependence. She felt on the cusp of her goal, Serenity
SERENITY
Bebe had a long and peaceful night's rest full of pleasant dreams. Another beautiful dawn informed all her senses that this was a perfectly normal day. Time did not slow nor speed nor expand, but drifted along smoothly, in perfect rhythm with her heart. She did her normal routine, had her normal breakfast, thought normal thoughts, felt normal things.
This was perfect! Bebe smiled with sympathy at the thought of Bratina Bratinstein. Her former antagonist was nothing more than a useful unpleasant memory. Because of her efforts to escape Bratina’s cruel and bitter criticism, her thoughts would now be nothing more than clouds crossing the sky. Now, she could simply be.
Bebe had exerted a great deal of effort to escape from Bratina and gain Serenity. But surprisingly, she found she had not gained anything, she had let go of things. By allowing her compassion to abandon the self imposed burden of hatred, the mindfulness that had always been there rose to the surface. By allowing her understanding to reject selfish desires, the insight that had always been there rose to the surface. By allowing her selflessness to cast out the embarrassment of a churlish ego, the wisdom that had always been there rose to the surface.
Her commitment to her path, guide and vows had brought her to this point, she knew and felt its correctness. She realized that, as it was with her, so it can be with each of us. We can all leave our Bratinas behind and nurture our better selves. We can use the tools of compassion, comprehension and selflessness to plant the seeds of mindfulness, insight and wisdom and pull the weeds of hate, ignorance and ego. Mindfulness, insight and wisdom, the three components of serenity that have always been there.
To her delight she found she had rediscovered something precious she had not realized she had lost,...a tender, innocent lightness in her heart.
Serenity now illuminated her interior landscape. All the forms of her thoughts, and the colors of her emotions, had coalesced into a beautiful image of balanced energy and peace. Her guiding light of compassion maintained its essential central position. Radiant waves of mindfulness, insight and wisdom gently imbued her awareness with assurances of the perfection of totality. This allowed her to let go of another thing, worry. She now knew and felt, in the most profound manner, that everything in Totality is exactly as it should be. That the puzzles that needed solving were lessons that needed to be learned. That, in the fullness of time, the human family would conclusively mature, and it would be a full realization of the human potential. It was a serenity not solely based on a selfish search for personal peace, but also on a quest to selflessly increase comprehension within the human family of the oneness of Totality.
Thus, enhancing the human experience, by providing peace and meaning for the human family. For her, the meaning of life could not be found by looking on the self centered personal level.
It could only be found by seeking in a selfless manner. If she searched for the meaning of life for the human family, the answer became more obvious. She comprehended that our existence can only have meaning when our goal is to mature as a species into beings capable of complete oneness with Totality. Every individual and the family as a whole, living every moment, nurturing mindfulness, insight and wisdom for the benefit of all beings. This journey also brings meaning to the individual, by being beacons of inspiration to each other through the sharing of lessons learned.
Our mindful experience of our thoughts and feelings will bring us, in the end, to what we are meant to be, for our journey is not to a specific place, or state like Kansas, or even Oz, but, to a shared state of being, a family at one with our marvelous, infinite Totality.
NEBULA
So, this has been the story of how Bebe taught herself to live at peace with her emotions. A story relatable to any person, time or place. In it, Bebe overcomes the three primary motivating factors of hate, fear and love by transcending the mundane perspective.
She has shown the way for each of us individually and for the human family as a whole. A path to relegate worldly matters to the trivialities they are. A method to continue on to our real task, the development of the spirit of the human family, for our own good and for the good of Totality. Like Bebe, when any individual is ready, they may leave Kansas behind and start their exploration of the universe, of Totality, within the vast expanse of their own mind.
The individual is not created separately from Totality, all that was, is, and will be. The implications of this are universally intimate. That is, for each individual this is an intimate fact of the individual’s existence. The Greek philosopher Protagoras said, “Man is the measure of all things.” This may have various interpretations but, surely one is, since Totality is indeed an intimate part of the individual and vice versa, when the individual looks outward and explores the universe, the individual is Totality experiencing itself. The reverse is also true. If a person delves deeply within themselves they are experiencing Totality and Totality is, again, experiencing itself! What better way could there be for Totality to experience itself than through the awareness of an empathetically perceptive individual, the more empathetic the better.
With this understanding, return to this line in Bebe’s guide “may all beings be tranquil.” Since Totality and all individuals are intimately connected, then all individuals are intimately connected and, on a certain level, all beings are one being! Now, assertions that had been purely religious can be embraced on a purely philosophical level. Such as when Rumi said ”You are not a drop in the ocean but, an entire ocean in a drop”. And “Love thy neighbor as thyself” becomes a perfectly reasonable assertion. The golden rule “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”, can mean “what you do to others, you do to yourself, and what you do to yourself you do to others.” So, efforts to give yourself tranquility and fulfill your potential by being as one with the universe are not entirely selfish pursuits, especially if you share your experience and understanding with others, and transmit that tranquility in your interactions with others.
Being one with the universe, to most people is esoteric and mysterious, as if it were necessary to engage in great effort to have an inkling of its fulfillment. However, the only effort that is involved is the effort of letting go. As Bebe discovered, it was the self imposed impediments of hatred, selfish desires and ego that created her distress. As Joseph Campbell said “When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness.” Simply release the concepts and constructs of the mundane perception, and adopt an awareness of the true nature of Totality, and therefore, yourself, and the human family.
It is entirely within every individual's abilities to contribute to the fulfillment of the potential of the human family. It is not necessary to be an Albert Einstein or a Mother Teresa. You need not give birth to a visionary or give half your wealth to charity. All that is required is that you do something to progress your spirit and the spirit of the human family.